Don’t read this!

Hey! I told you not to read this, so why are you?? Honestly, stop reading.

Don’t read any more.

I said stop!

Wow, you really are persistent aren’t you?

Well, if you are still reading I guess you’ve proven an important insight into our human psyche, and it’s become so important to understand right now. The latest UK COVID lockdown has caused such high levels of stress and anxiety and the difference in views and beliefs is polarising us, tearing families apart and causing friction between friends; challenging the connection that we are all craving so much.

Some seem to completely ignore the government’s restrictions, some take them incredibly seriously, and many seem to sit in the middle, making them work for them. So, barring all those with genuine mental health conditions and other valid reasons, why are so many people ignoring the lockdown rules?

Let’s start by asking you what were you thinking when you ignored my requests not to read this?

Looking in to yourself could give you a greater understanding of why others are doing something that you might not agree with and, in understanding why people do what they do, it’s much easier to empathise and forgive.

“We’re all so desperate to be understood, we forget to be understanding.”

Beau Taplin
Australian AuthorSo why did you read on?

For the same reason that Adam ate the forbidden fruit, children do exactly the opposite of what they were told to do, and books become more popular when they’re banned! In basic terms we’d probably call it reverse psychology, but let’s break it down a bit more:

• 1.) Reactance
• 2.) Rebound

1.) Reactance: Brehm first proposed reactance theory in 1966, and revisited it in 2006 to review those areas that were of most importance and highlight gaps still present in the research. This was taken up by an article in 2015 – Understanding Psychological Reactance, New Developments and Findings

The idea of reactance is that people are deeply motivated to protect their freedoms, says Jeff Greenberg, a professor of social psychology at the University of Arizona, and co-author of the article mentioned above. When people feel that their freedom is threatened – for example, they think someone is taking away their ability to make their own choices – they react against that threat, he said. Thus, they may feel angry or defensive and try to reverse the threat. That’s probably one reason why you carried on reading when I asked you not to – I was taking away your choice to read and nobody tells you what to read and what not to read, you’re your own person!

2.) Rebound: Have you ever heard of the “White Bear phenomenon”? It’s based on Daniel Wegner’s research, published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology in 1987 (Vol. 53, No. 1)

He designed a simple experiment where he asked one group to say their thoughts out loud and think of a white bear for five minutes and to ring a bell when they did.

In a second group, participants were also asked to verbalise their stream of consciousness for five minutes, while trying NOT to think of a white bear. If a white bear came to mind, they would also ring a bell. Despite trying not to think of a white bear, the participants thought of a white bear more than once per minute, on average, and some even said the words out loud!

Next, he asked the same participants to do the same exercise as the other group – Actively try TO think of a white bear. At that point, the participants thought of a white bear even more often than the first group. Suppressing the thought for the first five minutes had caused it to “rebound” even more prominently into the participants’ minds later. In perceiving the white bear as a threat to be avoided, the mind searched for it more!

So why are people ignoring the lockdown rules? The crux of it all is that we are all highly developed beings, living in a technologically advanced age, yet our subconscious autopilots still work with one aim – to protect us from perceived threat. The threat of COVID-19 may seem distant to some, only seen on TV or only knowing of indirect cases of severe illness or death, so that is not perceived as dangerous to us, but not being allowed to see our friends and family, what we perceive as having our freedom taken away, is a clear and consistent threat, so we push against it. Equally, people might happily spend days on end binging on box sets or having lie-ins when they have things to do, but when they are actually told not to go outside – to do the very thing they often do anyway, then all they can think of is the things they shouldn’t be thinking of! People wonder what they’re missing out on.

Crucially, most of it isn’t conscious and mean-spirited behaviour, it’s simply allowing sub-conscious reactions to control our behaviour, which happens to every one of us far more that we realise. So let’s remain understanding – we can’t control the situation but we can control our reaction to it. Please look after yourself and when we come out of this let’s hug our friends and family as hard as we can!

Click here for a list of resources if you, or anyone you know, is struggling with mental health or wellbeing.